Learning My New Way

I knew something was going on but my symptoms were so inconsistent that I brushed it off. As a single mom, working full time, teaching fitness classes and running several times a week maybe I just needed a little break, right? Wrong! After cutting back, my symptoms became worse and more frequent. There were random times when I would get really dizzy or feel like electric shocks were shooting through my body.  I also kept getting extremely exhausted during my runs.  Then one day last September, my leg went numb and my eyesight started to blur.

I was admitted to the hospital and told I was possibly developing Multiple Sclerosis (MS). I thought to myself “no way!” and since it wasn’t confirmed, I tried not to think about it. However, by January I had another attack and as of February 2015, was officially diagnosed with MS.

On one hand, I was relieved - I could finally put a name to all those weird feelings I was having. But, at the same time I was super terrified, “What would become of my life with MS?”  Fear and the physical problems sent me into a state of depression. I was used to being on the go and staying active with ease. Now, there were times when I couldn’t walk or even get out of bed.  Eventually I decided that my life was not going to be dictated by this condition. Giving up is just not a part of my makeup, I’m stubborn and a fighter!  On my bad days I began to tell myself, “just try to move for 5 minutes… after that you can rest”.  Sometimes 5 minutes would be all I had, other times I was able to go longer.  Either way I was moving and that made all the difference in the world for me!

Fast forward a few months to now and I’ve started treatment.  The medications slow the progression of the disease, but don’t necessarily make my symptoms go away. As a result, I’ve come to really appreciate the days I feel good and my body moves well.  I constantly remind myself that some exercise is better than nothing and walking is okay too.  Though I’ve been less active in the group, being a part of the S.T.A.R.S. sisterhood has definitely helped to keep me encouraged! This April, I completed my second half-marathon (against the wishes of many of my loved ones, lol). It was something I had to do to prove to myself that I can still do the things I love, just maybe in a different way. Though incredibly slower than my first half, I am so proud to say I finished!

I’m learning to embrace “my new way”.  Instead of giving up when life hits you, sometimes you just have to adjust and take a different route. For me that means running slower and less frequently sometimes.  Though I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE running, I’m starting to really enjoy yoga and weight lifting too! I get frustrated sometimes, but I believe God has put MS in my life for a good reason. I may not understand and I don’t have to. All I do know is that I’m gonna keep moving as much possible someway, somehow!

by Erin Webley, RDN

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist

Fitness Instructor